Deferral of Meaning

In the room

2011-05-22T18:43:00.000-07:00

I sat in a room with 400 others
There was talk of heaven and celebration
When it comes to death this community has it nailed
Heaven, reward, mansions, eternal retirement...

But in spite of the good news there were still tears and misty eyes
Siblings told stories
Mentors and leaders sang praises
Perhaps this person did no wrong

Death stalked and killed quickly
Likely an African legacy
"Craig has gone Home"
A servant whose task was done?

I felt alone
Though I expect there were other doubters laying low
What arrogance to doubt what the room knows to be true
Not just (but mostly) white upper-middle class Americans—some Africans too
Are we capable of self-deception at such a scale?
History suggests: Hell yes! But our histories fail to challenge the community's truths

I wondered what they will say about me on that day
"He lost his faith and became a doubter"
"Seduced by the wisdom of men"
Perhaps I will get credit for time served

But it really doesn't matter
At that point I'll know the truth, or be past knowing
At one with eternity, or looking at time stretched out forever

Outside the towers

2011-05-15T19:45:00.000-07:00

Leaving the tradition
No longer believing the sacred texts
I sit by the road near my old tower and marvel

My tower promised Truth, forgiveness, and eternal life
And delivers community, rules, endless obligations, and destiny
It’s an elaborate, ornate structure, with a rich history and traditions
Generations of scholars built up its troves of wisdom
Thousands of books, millions of sermons
Creeds spell out the essentials, most questions have answers
The sacred texts are central—but a challenge to make sense of
Even more confusing to live by
The sacred texts say they are inspired—therefore they must be

It’s still hard for me to believe the tower was built with human hands
How can so many people over the centuries be so wrong?
Lives have been changed, saved from disaster
Its rules usually work out so much better than instant gratification
But its claims for Truth don’t bear close inspection
Is it just cultural evolution set on a course
Reflecting older times where God’s hand was everywhere
And God demanded appeasement?

Other towers claim Truth too—it doesn’t help their story
But apparently God is not inclined to set things straight
We are told it’s OK for things to be confusing, otherwise why would we need faith?
It’s part of the master plan, and God’s thoughts are much higher than ours
Or perhaps these towers are Babels—built of burnt bricks, stacked by human hands

The tower of Science is different
Its dwellers know that its doctrines are flawed
Not everything is explained, they look forward to inevitable change
Bringing them closer to reality
I’m a part time dweller there, but sometimes I feel the call to go sit outside
And sit in the dirt

The other towers are not so fond of this late-comer Science
Continually rocking the boat—challenging perfectly good doxies
Alternate stories for beginnings—the universe and life
Rainbows explained
Miracles ignored, genealogies discounted

Mostly I don’t miss living in my old tower
Trying to rationalize doctrines that don’t make sense
Or dealing with rules pulled out of thin air or worse
But I do miss destiny
And the promise that all things work together for good—for those in the tower

God still calls, and I try to answer
I still pray and ask for favors
God no longer demands blood, sacrifice, and worship
But still requires justice, kindness, and humility
And love

Limitations imposed by language

2011-03-27T15:36:00.000-07:00

Languages differ essentially in what they must convey and not in what they may convey.
Roman Jakobson

An example given in this article demonstrates how a statement made in English can withhold information that must be disclosed in French.

Eternity

2010-12-18T21:40:00.000-08:00

"Eternity is another name of the presence of the present."

Jacques Derrida "Ousia and Grammē"

Another direction

2010-11-25T09:30:00.000-08:00

Consciousness arose by itself

Awareness of the other was one of the consequences

The unity of the world was lost and the knowledge of death was gained

Our horizon exploded from the moment to eternity

And the search for our beginnings began

Making love was the only way to return to the way it was

Am I my others keeper?

2010-08-28T05:59:00.000-07:00

Adoption
Medical trips to exotic locations, the more dangerous the better
Mission trips to that orphanage in Mexico or Ecuador
Keeping those missionaries on location, or funding those frequent forays to Japan
Family
Totally other—God? It requires no keeping, and can’t be kept
Giving to one is withholding from another

Echos of a struggling species, eking out an existence hunting and gathering
Numbers so small, even the weak are valuable
Breaking the bones to get at the marrow
No books, not much language, knowledge carried by the old
Death by so many ways, including birthing that baby with too big a head
That big brain that sees the other as more than just an extension of I
An independent being that knows it has being
That brain that recognizes that the other is not just outside but inside
And the inside is outside
Consciousness knowing that it will die, that it's unique in the universe
Not one with the universe, the environment, the pack, or the flock—just one

Giving to one is withholding from another, how do we decide
Some we can help, others just die—never fully formed, sick, hurt, or just old
Do we nurture youth or knowledge, build strength, or just hold our numbers?
Is that annoying elder worth the trouble when they don't even forage
One time when we move they won’t keep up—problem solved
The young an obvious good investment, a future meal ticket if they turn out alright

How do I decide what gifts I give
What sort of an economy should I expect—besides the handwritten thank you card
Do we need more than 6 billion people to preserve our DNA?
Extinction more likely from an excess of neutrons than starvation, or a hard winter
Extinction—nature pruning unsuccessful choices, paths gone wrong, niches no longer big enough

My thing—giving to those that cross my path
Those bold enough to look me in the eye and ask, sometimes silently
Or nudge me with their need

History

2010-08-21T15:06:00.000-07:00

History in and of itself conveys the motif of a final repression of difference

--A slight re-configuration of Derrida's words from his essay: "Différance"

Stone Tablets

2010-04-23T20:56:00.000-07:00

Does God reveal itself
in incremental ways?

Forbidden fruit, unpleasing sacrifices,
near global destruction, murderous commands?

Blood soaked rituals foreshadowing
a human sacrifice

Abraham prophesies on the way to kill his son:
"God will provide for himself the lamb"

Sacrifice our lives to achieve eternal rewards,
toe the line to preserve the status quo—
a stable community with mouths to feed and
a religious hierarchy to maintain

Someone to inform us of the rules and shame
our bad behavior

Is that God's plan?

This paradox-ridden mess called God's Word.
Inconsistent rules destabilizing our cultures and continually
mutating to serve someone's purpose.

In a fit of anger Moses throws and breaks God's handwritten notes
Astonishing it was such fragile stuff

Misplaced rage—or a metaphoric
breaking of chains too heavy to bear?

Is it time for us to throw down an idolized Bible
no longer able to bear the label of Truth?

Perhaps that is the plan...

Primacy of Grace?

2010-04-18T12:43:00.000-07:00

"Justice is the red haired stepchild of Grace"

Stan Ebel

Choices

2010-03-28T19:15:00.000-07:00

Randomness or Synchronicity

Evolution or Destiny

Self or God (ontological center)

Survival or Purpose

Absence or Invisible Presence

Brain Disturbances or Nudges

Coincidences or Miracles

Death or Resurrection

Culture or Justice

Rupture or Evil (physical, cultural, developmental)

Faith or Faith

The center...

2010-02-11T21:15:00.000-08:00

"Is not the center, the absence of play and difference, another name for death? "

"Ellipsis" Derrida

Derrida on play

2010-01-31T22:29:00.000-08:00

"There is nothing outside the text; all is textual play with no connection with original truth."

In another earlier text, Derrida defined play as "the absence of the transcendental signified as limitlessness of play, that is to say as the destruction of ontotheology and the metaphysics of presence."

Derrida also wrote, "The absence of the transcendental signified extends the domain and the play of signification infinitely

From: JACQUE DERRIDA, DECONSTRUCTIONISM & POSTMODERNISM

By Cky J. Carrigan, Ph. D. (April 1996)

Primordial writing

2009-12-20T12:30:00.000-08:00

The first writing was the memory of the spoken.

On Dreams...

2009-12-20T12:28:00.000-08:00

"The laconic, lapidary quality of dreams is not the impassive presence of petrified signs."

Derrida "Freud and the Scene of Writing"

Différance -- differ and defer...

2009-11-27T14:16:00.000-08:00

"Derrida indicates that différance gestures at a number of heterogeneous features which govern the production of textual meaning. The first (relating to deferral) is the notion that words and signs can never fully summon forth what they mean, but can only be defined through appeal to additional words, from which they differ. Thus, meaning is forever "deferred" or postponed through an endless chain of signifiers. The second (relating to difference, sometimes referred to as espacement or "spacing") concerns the force which differentiates elements from one another and, in so doing, engenders binary oppositions and hierarchies which underpin meaning itself."

--from the Wikipedia article on différance

History

2009-11-25T21:22:00.000-08:00

History--the airbrushing speech of the victor/vanquished.

--from the Wikipedia article on différance

God--the Thief

2009-11-10T23:00:00.000-08:00

"God is thus the proper name of that which deprives us of our own nature, of our own birth; consequently he will always have spoken before us, on the sly. He is the difference which insinuates itself between myself and myself as my death." Derrida "La parole soufflée"

Of Judaism and reawakening Greeks

2009-10-25T20:53:00.001-07:00

But if one calls this experience of the infinitely other Judaism (which is only a hypothesis for us), one must reflect upon the necessity in which this experience finds itself, the injunction by which it is ordered to occur as logos, and to reawaken the Greek in the autistic syntax of his own dream.

Derrida "Violence and Metaphysics"

Three Readings

2009-10-10T11:08:00.000-07:00

Recently I have been thinking about how we interpret the bible, often unconsciously, through our culture, traditions, and belief systems. Below, I have tried to reveal those interpretations for three, very different people.

Reader #1

For God [big guy on the throne] so loved the world [except for homosexuals, Muslims, liberal Democrats, and the ACLU of course] that He [male, authority figure] gave his only Son, [male, empathy figure] that whoever[yes, anyone] believes [affirms the Apostle’s Creed, accepts Jesus as their personal savior, believed that God raised him from the dead, confesses that they are a sinner and commits to an ongoing reduction of sinning—including not smoking, drinking, fornicating, and going to R rated movies, is pro-life and holds that the Scriptures are the inerrant word of God] in Him [male empathy figure] should not perish [spiritual death, not physical death] but have eternal life [in heaven while all the non-believers are tortured eternally in the fires of hell]

Reader #2

For God [destructive invention of man] so loved [Ha, some kind of love that torments forever those that don't bow down to you] the world [full of deluded people that insist there is a God] that He gave [beware, this gift has some serious strings attached!] his only Son, [Where's Mom? Couldn't the two of you managed more than one kid, with all that omnipotence?] that whoever believes [...and shuts down their frontal lobes] in Him [that raving prophet in the 1st Century with delusions of grandeur and an apparent suicidal streak] should not perish [it seems that lots of believers have perished--jokes on them] but have eternal life. [What a convenient fiction! Keep the masses quiet with unverifiable promises. Suck it up now and keep those tithes coming--but heaven will be great, singing songs and all that, plus throw in a few virgins to attract the young men ]

Reader #3

For God[Consuming fire and love that fills the universe] so loved the world [What manner of love is this? Apparently not the unconditional acceptance sort of love, or the I Cor 13 "Love does not insist on its own way" sort of love. The love of offering choices.] that He [Can we get over the He/She thing and recognize that God transcends gender? Two thousand years ago I can see that people weren't ready for this, but now? Come on! We don't require "The Force" in Star Wars to be a he or a she] gave [Well, more like offers. The "gift" has strings--just your life is required. God offers a great gift, but for a gift to be a gift there must be a willing recipient-even something wonderful, if forced upon us it ceases to be a gift.] his only son, [Another tired metaphor? Christ is a son only in the most abstract sense. There is no mother, no possibility of other siblings to add significance to his "only-ness" There is no sequence to the Father and the Son -- they both precede time] that whoever believes [So the only requirement is belief. What manner of belief is this? And how long must it be maintained? Continuously until we die? Or is there a five second rule on belief sufficient for collecting the prize? Jesus gives us some clues: Moses in the desert raises sin (a serpent) on a piece of wood and only asks that the dying look at the serpent, a look was enough] in Him should not perish [ as was his custom, Jesus is muddying the waters with respect to death. Of course he means spiritual, not physical death.] but have eternal life.[It seems that the damned have eternal life too--at least in some passages, but we can reasonably assume eternal life is a good thing. Pretty mysterious place, we will still have bodies, a physical reality, no marriages, but nice places to stay.]

Formal Indication

2009-09-13T22:49:00.000-07:00

"The only way to thematize a being that cannot be named is to indicate it formally, to point at it exhortatively in such a way that we are drawn to perform the act of thinking that will light up the being for ourselves."

The Early Heidegger & Medieval Philosophy: Phenomenology for the Godforsaken

by S. J. Mcgrath

"The key to a formal indication is that it does not subsume or enclose particulars within or under it, does not precontain them, but simply points an indicative finger at "singularities: that are beyond its ken, kind, genus, and generic appetite. The facticity or singularity, on the other hand is not "conceived" or "grasped" but entered into, given in to, by a certain practical or praxical engagements, which means that you can never "get" it from the outside and you can never "get into" it except by "doing" it, facere veritatem.

"Deconstruction in a nutshell" John Caputo

Metaphor and Language

2009-09-07T22:30:00.000-07:00

"Before being a rhetorical procedure within language, metaphor would be the emergence of language itself" Derrida "Violence and Metaphysics"

The Metaphysics of Desire

2009-08-30T21:09:00.000-07:00

Derrida "Violence and Metaphysics" Italics are the author's

"Metaphysical transcendence is desire."
"Thus, the metaphysics of desire is a metaphysics of infinite separation"
"Incapable of respecting the Being and meaning of the other, phenomenology and ontology would be philosophies of violence."

Genesis

Your desire shall be for [against] your husband, and he shall rule over you.” Genesis 3: 16 ESV
If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for [against] you, but you must rule over it.” Genesis 4: 7 ESV

The Illusion of Ethics

2009-08-20T21:11:00.000-07:00

Ethics do not exist--only decisions are real

The universal cannot be trusted--you must do/love/walk as is required of you

Truth and the Scriptures

2009-08-20T20:27:00.000-07:00

"Greogory's deconstructive strategies of refutation, in the end, indict both language and the Scriptures. Comprised of a variety of genres, none of which sustains a systematic approach, the Scriptures defy the type of positivistic analytic endoresed by Eunomius. In all of this, there seem to be at least three loci of subversion: the diastemic and kinetic constitution of thinking/speaking man and the language he employs, the diverse composition of the primary source text, and the subversion of language and logic by the Logos, in respect to both his incarnation and his place in the Trinity."

"Theology of the Gap" Scot Douglass pg 123

Knowledge, Faith, and Belief

2009-08-18T22:50:00.000-07:00

"I don't know. One must believe." Derrida

"I believe; help my unbelief!" Father of demon possessed boy Mark 9:24 (ESV)

"And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would drawn near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him" Apostle Paul Heb 11:6 (ESV)

"Before God and with God we live without God." Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Searching for Truth

2009-06-20T09:26:00.000-07:00

"The discovery of truth begets an everlasting search whose value is in the search itself. Since dimensional man is, himself, kinetic, he must continually be becoming. What a believer can do is continually "stand within" openings of truth, eternal openings that infinitely grow in size."

Scot Douglass in "Theology of the Gap" pg230

Community without Community

2009-04-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about the role of Christian community, perhaps a.k.a."The Church", compared to our individuality--especially in what passes for truth and sound doctrine.

I very frustrated with the Evangelicals being locked-up over the stories in Genesis chapter 1 through 11. These stories, useful for thousands of years as powerful lessons have now become a powerful destroyer of community and I believe a hindrance to the Spirit of God. Validated by no less than Jesus himself (Matt 24) the creation stories collide with scientific discovery--creating an unacceptable tension. The Evangelicals call upon us to reject the truth of what nature presents in favor of a hermeneutic. A hermeneutic that allows violation of at least one of the Ten Commandments (keeping the Sabbath), but does not allow other statements to be interpreted in a historical way.

I was nudged last night to find my copy of "Deconstruction in a nutshell" --edited / commentary by Caputo. I did find it (I've been looking for it for weeks), and read the chapter on "community without community".

The possibility of community is sustained by its impossibility. Our uniqueness, the radical contingency of our being, and the impossibility of agreeing on everything makes community impossible. Christians are called to community, and are pushed beyond themselves--to give and to minister traditionally, but perhaps we are also called to accept new versions of truth (heresy!).

The lack of openness in the Christian community towards science plants potential seeds of its destruction. Its insistence on agency in the creation of life throws it against the theory of evolution--and I fear the community will break.

Adding scientific facts into the conversation has no impact on the true believers--the wagons are circled, the hermeneutic of inerrancy is the redoubt (curious word). Those that don't know science are enthralled by the few scientists that support their world.

What is God's Love?

2008-12-14T15:23:00.000-08:00

I get very annoyed with people that seem to be continually defining God on their terms. Their God tends to be very politically correct (no warring or genocide allowed), but when they are done defining God, it seems to me there is nothing left but platitudes about love.

It seems that the statement that "God is love" does not map well into our human understanding of Love
Scot Douglass' statement "Every truth about God is always also a lie about Him" -- is "God is love" one of those truths that is also an untruth?
Is this a problem of language -- are we in the realm of the ineffable?
Do some attributes of God transcend love?
Do we need different categories of Love? The love of humans and the love of God?
1 Cor 13:5 "It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful" has a very human centric and pragmatic feel to it. Anyone that is in relationship feels the truth of this.
John 3:16 agape love

Why did God put "The Tree" in the Garden--a different kind of Love?

2008-12-13T16:39:00.000-08:00

While I don't expect any answers, the question of how evil arose in a universe that God created is an interesting issue. I am fairly comfortable with the notion that evil was allowed to spring into existence so that we could have free will, but of course there are lots of problems with that position.

Either as a history, or an inspired myth, I have been wondering why God put the tree of the knowledge of good and evil in the garden--putting a tempting, death delivering temptation close to our children is not something we would consider doing.

Why would a loving God put a deadly temptation in the reach of an apparently naive couple? This does not match our usual definitions of loving behavior. We usually don't expose our children to deadly threats!

The tree was "a delight to the eyes" and good for food. Not only was the tree dangerous it was attractive.

Aligns with the early statement when the garden was created that "every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food" (non-pleasant looking trees excluded?)

You can argue the couple was not even fully capable of understanding the prohibition. They hadn't achieved the sense of self that would enable them to recognize their nakedness.

God's command framed: You may, and "you shall not eat." In vs 3:11, God referred to it as a command

Would the words "death", "good", "evil" (especially) have any meaning to them?

Is this God's role in evil? --> creating the choice, the possibility of the "not good"?

The fall did not create evil -- how could there be a word for it otherwise?
(was the rebellion of Satan the instantiation of evil, or is it more fundamental than that (Did God make the existence of darkness inevitable, when He create the light?)
("This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all." 1 Jn 1:5)
If viewing the fall as an inspired myth regarding the rise of consciousness, what does the serpent signify?
God put the potential for disobedience in the garden and foreshadowed the solution with the tree of life.